Posted in Chloe, passion, self-reflection

Do I need to find my life purpose?

Do I need to find my life purpose?

This short question has been haunting me for years. Until recent months, it became a torment for me.

When I was young, I have always been searching for my “life purpose”. Why am I here? Who am I? What am I supposed to do with my life? I refuse to live a mainstream life aka a normal employee earning OK income. I want to find my very own and unique path that will make me jump out of bed with joy and excitement every morning, super looking forward to start my day because I have a life purpose. Because it shows that my life is worth living.

Initially, I thought I would start by finding (out) what’s my passion in life. I love reading, I like writing and singing. When I was younger, I love being in front of a camera, pretending to be some mega superstar. Born and raised in a society whereby the Government encouraged you to graduate and be a nice and obedient employee, being a writer or a singer or an actress sounded impossible and rebellious. Most importantly, I probably won’t earn much money from doing those. Or worse, there’s not even any market for me. Talk about low self-esteem or lack of determination. Or maybe I am simply not “passionate” enough. And oh, I am not a rebellious person. I love peace and stability. I’m OK to dealing with changes but I would rather not.

The most rebellious thing I have done so far is to quit my job last year without a job, and my most rebellious decision I have made so far is to continue to stay without a job right now when everyone else is urging me to find a job. Not going to rant much about it because I just wrote about that in my previous post.

I left my previous job thinking that I could search for my life purpose and turn pure passion into money-making passion. That’s the most ideal scenario, isn’t it? Perfect life! Sometimes I wonder why am I not born with a passion to perhaps ice-skate, so I can be the next Kim Yuna. But the reality is that till now, I still don’t know what’s my passion. Or maybe I have not made up my mind or what is. Sure, I have some hobbies I am passionate about, but they feel quite different from being life purpose. And so I am stuck with myself. How should I describe myself to me now? Indecisive, lazy, procrastinator, perfectionist. Yes, I begin to think I am a perfectionist! Everything must be good; in Chinese there’s a saying which is 天时地利人和. Which means the time, place, people and etc must be align and “right” and smooth before I execute something.

My God.

The results? Me not accomplishing anything, because I started nothing.

And then I realise, do I need to find my life purpose, right now? No, I don’t.

No, you don’t! If you happened to be in the same shithole as I am. Or was. I hope it’s a “was”.

What is a perfect moment? There will be none! We are always changing our thoughts, changing our minds, how can there be a perfect moment to act? Now I understand the wise saying of “the time to act is now”, thus this article right now. Every time I feel like writing, I don’t know why I just think about it only and not to switch on my laptop and write it. I just feel like there’s some aches of longingness in my heart to write and yet. And yet? I did not. Why? Because I am afraid. Why am I afraid? Afraid that no one will read the things I write. That I have high hopes that it will reach a lot of people but in reality, no one is reading it. Then I will have to conclude that I am a failure in the area that I love. Then I have to stop doing it because it is not giving me any results. But I didn’t think of the why must I stop doing it if I actually enjoy doing it even though no one appreciates it? Does it matter? Yes, it does, because I like to share! Haha. But honestly? No one gives a damn. So why am I damning myself? And who can determine if I have failed? Only myself. If I think that I am a failure, then I am. Period.

OK, I don’t know what I am writing anymore, but I guess that’s a good thing because I am simply letting my thoughts to flow and my hands to type by themselves, haha. So do I need to find a life purpose? Right now? No. I should be giving my life its purpose, and not trying to find it while doing nothing.

OMG I just got my own answer!

This worth re-mentioning:

I should be giving my life its purpose, and not trying to find it while doing nothing.

Posted in Career and Jobs, Challenge, Chloe, Life, random rants, self-doubt, self-love, self-reflection, self-worth

I need to wake up and get my arse moving.

Let’s talk about a stage right now that I am feeling quite alone.

I just passed my 29th birthday so I am no longer in my adolescent years. I am a newlywed of close to six months and so I am not fretting over any singlehood status. Even though I am currently unemployed, I am living with my retired in-laws so I need not fret that there is no one to chat with me. So why am I feeling all alone?

The loneliness is in the soul. It feels like no one understands the void and longing in me right now. Maybe even I don’t know what I need to do to fill this void.

Ever since two years ago, I started to become pretty spiritual. I don’t mean diving head down into a particular religion nor do I mean practising magic or conversing with spirits. I mean this growing and gnawing thirst in me to explore the unseen. If I were to time-travel and tell my 25-year-old self that I would one day lean towards spirituality, she would probably stare in disbelief and scoff. Seriously. I was that away from spirituality then. In fact, all my life I always questioned the common religions around me. Buddhism, Taoism, Christianity… I used to sit down for more than two hours with a preacher on Christianity and bombarded her with all the “logical” questions I have on her faith. I used to read the bible and raised all sort of questions to a few Christian colleagues who couldn’t answer to my satisfaction. And it didn’t help that the answers contradict with the answers I got from a Catholic colleague.

Whoa, hold on, before you flip the table, I am not here to dis any religion or faith. I was young and self-absorbed; my time simply wasn’t ripe yet, if you know what I mean. I thought the only reality that is real was the reality I can see with my eyes, smell with my nose, hear with my ears and maybe even taste with my tongue.

Until my then-boyfriend-now-husband introduced me to this book series called the Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch.

Honestly? I had avoided reading when he first shoved Book 1 into my face. Well, I just couldn’t! Looking at the title, apparently, it is going to talk about God and religion; maybe Christianity or Catholicism. I was so uninterested. The funny thing is, after some time, one day out of the blue, I had the urge to pick up the book and read it. No kidding. It was one of the “book urges” whereby I usually have a sudden strong urge to read a certain book and will amazingly find answers to my current issues/ problems/ situations within the pages. I opened the book and read it, and then there was no turning back for me.

If you know me personally, you would remember how I was a super no-God kind of person. To me then, there were a bunch of “loopholes” that I just couldn’t bring myself to believe. But the strangest thing happened: not only do I enjoy the book tremendously (the series blew my mind away), there was not even one doubt in my mind at all! It felt like I knew what was written in there to be true; no question asked. I really can’t explain why, but I guess the time is right for me to start awakening. Awaken to the unseen truth in the universe. it felt like a whole new world of truth was revealed to me. It was an amazing feeling that I wish I could remain in it forever.

Gradually, this feeling faded when “reality” sets in: job. Also at the time, I got interested in the idea of Law of Attraction (to primarily increase my wealth and luck). Though I believe in it (to a certain extent), I didn’t practice it vigorously like some successful and wealthy people do. Together with it, my mindset changed. It changed from thinking that job-is-security to start-your-own-business-so-you-will-have-a-higher-chance-to-retire-better-and-earlier. There was a period where I think that having more and lots of money is extremely important. I thus got dissatisfied with the life I was living. Snoozed when my alarm rang, pulled myself out of bed, commuted to work like sardines in a can, super busy with work from 8.30am to 6pm, sometimes needed to work overtime till 8pm or even later, commuted back home like sardines in a can again, spent three hours or so “unwinding” (which means doing mindless stuff such as camping in Facebook, Instagram, Youtube and reading novels), then finally, forced myself to sleep just to start the next day like a breathing zombie. It freaked me out that I would be spending my days and months and years like that, for the rest of my life. I could easily be one of the many walking dead and waited till my life comes to an end without achieving anything special. Or worth mentioning. How would my eulogy be like at my wake? Do I want to be known as someone who was holding a XX position in XX company for XX number of years or do I want to be known as a kind, loving, gentle, humble and wise woman?

So two months before my wedding (which was in Oct 2016), I quitted my job. People around me were shocked because I left my job without another next in the line, especially when I was two months to my wedding when I needed money the most. But yeah, I quitted my job. I kept myself busy with all the wedding preparation. Finally, my wedding day came and passed, I went for my honeymoon in Europe and came back, went briefly into another job for more than a month, quitted at the end of 2016 and officially from 1 Jan 2017, I am unemployed and… I am stuck. With myself.

Logically, I should either start my own business or find another job. Plainly speaking, do something productive so I am earning money and feeling worthy. Or simply to get people off my back. But here I am, more than five months after my wedding day, jobless, refusing to find another job, not interested in being an entrepreneur.

Honestly? I don’t really like the current me now. I quitted my job thinking that I would be starting my life anew doing great stuff. I started 2017 thinking to myself that I would take a short break, I see it as a reward for working continuously for more than 8 years since graduation. I told myself I needed some time anyway to adjust to being newly married and living with in-laws. Whenever people I meet asked me about what I am currently doing, my plans and etc, I would dish out the script I drafted last year but never, ever get around actualising it.

Less than one month into my unemployment status, I started to find stress coming from all directions. My husband, parents and in-laws would think that I am wasting my time doing nothing. Initially in my first one or two months of unemployment, I could straighten my back and inform them that I do have plans in mind, but I am simply taking a break now. I would also remind them that I have been out of job for only one or two months and it’s a normal thing for people nowadays to take a short break in between jobs.

But in March 2017, right now, I can kid myself no further. The same script which I have used on all my loved ones does not work well for them and me anymore. Me, especially for me. It is hard to admit it to myself, but I no longer feel good about my current situation. The situation which I have created. Some friends envy me for being able to stay at home without a job when my husband is providing for me. They envy me that I can lay around all day doing nothing. But what they didn’t know and what I didn’t expect was the stress I felt. In fact, it was even more stressful than when I was in a job (especially when my in-laws keep pushing me to have a baby soon). To be fair, my husband and in-laws are kind and understanding people who are OK with me starting a new and different path, as long as I am moving forward and not remaining status quo like now. I also became super sensitive, thinking that everyone (almost) is judging me, deeming me as unworthy and wasting my time. I told my husband just last week, when I think I was on the point of breaking, that why is everyone judging someone’s worth by the job they have and the money that they bring in? Why can’t they see past these materialistic points and see a person’s inner values?

Now, come to think of it, I wasn’t wrong but I wasn’t right too. If I were really doing something, if I were really moving forward, albeit slowly, I believe my loved ones would be encouraging instead of criticising. But I wasn’t. I was simply standing on the same place where I left my last job. But what came out from my mouth last week to my husband sounded more like lame excuses to justify my procrastination and unwillingness to move forward in the material world than pure and unbias opinion.

This is where the inner struggle comes into the picture. The thirst to find seclusion in this busy world and explore my spirituality self.

My logical mind thinks that it is best for me to either get a job or start fulfil my script (write a book, make Youtube videos, conduct seminars or workshops). But my wilful heart just want to find a quiet place and explore all the wonders and possibilities of this universe… spiritually. Sounds ridiculous? But this is really how I am feeling.

This period is unbearable. Maybe you are thinking, why can’t you just do one of these things you listed? Procrastination. Procrastination is really one of the scariest and most dangerous state of mind and being to be in. Instant gratification is so tempting that I put off things I ought to do that will allow me to benefit and grow in the long run. I admit I am quite a procrastinator for most of my life. And the scary thing about it is that I am beginning to detest myself for being one. I love myself! Well, I should be! Do I? If I do, why am I sabotaging myself?

What I need to do now is to strike balance. The balance between living in this real world and still practice spirituality in my life. I can’t believe it took me so long to realise this, to think about this. Balance! Unless I could abandon all things and find my seclusion in some high mountain cave, otherwise, I better balance my life.

So, what’s my plan now? There is no plan. I think I should stop making plans and keeping them all in my head only. OK, maybe I should have a general plan, to serve as a general guide. Not going to ramble about it much, because it would probably sound like another “script” right now. Just do it! That whatever idea which comes into my mind instead of fondling with it until it grows old and dies.

Reading what I have written from the top, which I intended to write about my spiritual loneliness, this article turns out to be some kind of self-reflection. Oh well. There’s this saying that Plans can never keep up with Changes, yea?

Posted in Chloe, random rants

2017 Comeback (LOL What, Do I Think I Am Like a KPOP Artiste?)

I’m typing this in the middle of the night (currently at 1.24am to be precise).

This is pretty random. Few hours ago, it occurred to be that I still have a blog in WordPress! I started the blog on a high and then it just…die off. Two years ago.

=.=

Now I decided to revive it! Haha. Not on a whim, though. Ok, maybe this post is indeed on a whim, but I have made up my mind lately to really continue with blogging. And so, 凭着一股三分钟热度的enthusiasm I changed my blog format! It now looks soooo much cheerier than before 😀 More like me, not acting serious and all. LOL.

In these two years while I was “away”, I have quit my job, gotten married, and am now shaking leg (I wish. OK, maybe a little) at home. After eight consecutive years of being in the workforce since graduation from poly, I think this is the best time for me to stop and rest for a while and then… change a new career path (O.M.G. at age close to 30!). AND, I am super grateful for my husband who is soooo supportive (in case he is reading this, you know). Husband, Saranghae ❤

The difference between my future posts and my past few posts is that I’m not going to rack my brain anymore trying to think of “awesomely-good” content to blog about. I’m just gonna follow my heart and type whatever comes to my mind. Haha! Gonna stop trying to impress people~ Because…seriously. This is a really bad habit of mine: trying to be perfect. In the end, I got nothing that I have in mind started because I don’t think I have perfected in any of the things I wanna do. Sad leh. 😦

Wait. Come to think of it, this is my first blog post again after a two-year hiatus…and in January somemore…I should have started with a post on resolu—

*yawns* OK, finally feeling sleepy. It’s 1.43am now and my husband is still playing his Secret World but I don’t frigging care so I’m gonna turn in to bed already!

Nights 😀

XOXO

Chloe ❤

Posted in gratitude, Life, self-love

Thank You and Goodbye, 2014.

Hello there, 2014.

You have not been a good year for me and I will be glad to bid you farewell.

I am not the only one who thinks so of you; the majority of the people around me hold the same opinion of you as I do.

My health, family and work are in jeopardy with you. However, you have also been the year where I have uncovered awesome strengths in myself and found more values for myself. You have been a year of many life lessons learnt.

We started off with bad health. In fact, the bad health persists even until now, haha. You have seen me developed rashes all over my body, and this lasted for months. For a while I thought the cause was bedbugs, and this remains a mystery.

My period has not been accurate and this has got to be my major health concern for the year. I have come to appreciate the cramps I had when I was having my period and the “cumbersome” cleaning up. I would cheer and rejoice if my period was to happen now! So, to all women and girls out there, please be grateful for your monthly period because it shows that you are on the healthier side. A real woman. Having irregular menstruation or having a long period of no-menstruation is destructive for one’s body. We women need this monthly blood change to flush out toxins. I am no doctor, but I can feel the difference in my body when my period has gone MIA (missing in action) for months. And the difference is not a positive one.

Our journey together towards the mid-year was the worst.

Where shall I begin? More than half of my colleagues in my team have left us, one after another. Out of nine, only three of us remained to hold the fort. Long hours of work and heavy workload, and it hasn’t help much that I was not more than five months into the new environment. The initial stage was pretty okay though; I was unbelievably positive. I was somehow feeling totally fine with the strenuous working pattern, day in and day out. I have held visions and spoken positive monologue with myself. They certainly helped and I feel thankful for those.

However, it has to be at this same time that my family met with one of our biggest crisis. I was hesitant to be completely open to you in here but I believe I have now seen the worst to care such. Well, my family is falling apart.

We hadn’t been exactly a happy family. We were a traditional Asian family whereby the father is strict and there is always a distance between each family member. Like so many youngsters in this era, we spent most of our time outside with so many friends but with our own family members. I have always known when I was very young that my parents do not have a loving relationship together. I remembered I was amazed when I saw middle aged married couples put their arms around each other with smiles full of love. I didn’t think that those were possible, because it certainly isn’t in my family. Well, despite all the mentioned and our differences, our seemingly nonchalant-ness, our minimal communication, I thought that we could be forever. But I was wrong.

When it happened, surprisingly, I took it pretty well. Like I have said, you have got to be the year which I have surpassed myself in every single way. I am known for being fiercely loyal to the people I love and I will expect the same treatment in return. However, when it happened, I did not blame my father. The fault lies in all of us. We have grown apart so much that perhaps my father felt that it is pointless to stay as a family together. I did not blame him for seeking comfort outside the family.

No one at work knows about my family drama aside for a couple of closed ones. I have to be the strong one in my family. Through this family crisis, I have witnessed how vulnerable my mother and my younger brother can be. For months, I have lived with worry and fear of losing them too. I was so afraid that they, especially my beloved mother, could not handle Life itself.

It was a very, very tough period of time.

Gradually, the drama at home and at work is taking its toll on me. I can feel my strength slipping away, I can feel my energy being zapped away. But I cannot go down; both sides needed me.

Now, I am so, so glad that things are started to look up. I have survived! Things have gotten so much better now, and I am feeling extremely thankful. My mother is walking out of it, my brother is more positive, I got a job promotion and my relationship with everyone around me has become even better. Guess my only regret will be my father…

Until now, I do not know how I have managed through all these. The woes of my health, family and work. A friend who got to knew commented that if I did not share with him, he would never have known, because I betray no sign at all~

Isn’t it wasted of my talent that I am not able to be an actress at Mediacorp? Wahaha!

I have learnt too many lessons this year and I have received many valuable gifts too.

I am now a strong believer that Time heals everything. As long as you never give up on yourself, everything will pass with time. All the sadness, worry, fear, anger, torture… and love. So, it is very important that we give thanks each day when we wake up to a new day alive, and give thanks each night when we close our eyes and sleep in peace. To be able to do so is a precious gift not to be taken for granted.

I have seen how destructive this crisis was for my mother. To not be able to sleep a wink for months is like moving towards a slow and conscious death. Thus please, cherish. This is because you will never know what will be in store for you tomorrow, or on the next hour, the next minute, the next second. Time will never stop for you.

Oh, and I have grown highly resilient! Well, at least in my personal context. I never expected myself not to throw in the white towel at all, haha! It has been all very amazing. *pat my own back*

The books I have read, the people I have met, the classes I have attended, the days I have lived, all of these have helped me tide through 2014. I feel like a different person as I was one year ago. I am now more self-aware, more grateful and more positive than ever!

Thank you, 2014. You have not been extremely kind to me, but you have been very practical with me. The valuable lessons which I have learnt from you have definitely shaped me into a better person who is able to work more confidentiality and surely into her future!

So, 2015, here I come!

Love

Chloe ❤

Posted in Challenge

Day 15: [X]

Alright! Finally! The 15th and last affirmation for this challenge~

Day 15: [Insert your affirmation]

Okay. I guess subconsciously I was avoiding doing this. HAHA. Nope, not exactly some lame excuse, but I have come to know myself a lot more this year: I may be a weird perfectionist.

Why do I say “weird”?

From my previous affirmation post, and of course, from my procrastination history, you would know that I am one pretty lazy human. I love visualizing sweet victories and perfect endings. But I hate the process of achieving them. I wish I could have a remote control which I could skip all the in-betweens and dive straight into the wonderful results. But alas, life does not operate in such a lazy manner, and thus the procrastination. My gosh! I feel like kicking myself now, LOL.

It took me a long time to start up this blog because I want everything to be perfect; it would take me months, or even years to write a book because I would want the book to be perfect. But life is not perfect. Yeah, I understand it, but I just cannot get around it.

Okay! I have digressed!

  1. Create your own unique affirmation.

“…what is one positive affirmation you’d like to create for yourself, to help you achieve your greatest success in life moving forward? What is one positive affirmation that’ll have the most meaning to you, that you haven’t already practiced/identified in the past 14 tasks?”

My affirmation:

It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop. Trust in your heart, mind and soul because you are nothing if you cannot believe in yourself.

  1. What’s so special about this affirmation?

Confucius’ words are always of great wisdom. I borrowed the first sentence from him for my personal affirmation:

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.”

I came across this sentence from Confucius in a train station advertisement board and it had since stuck with me. I am always tempted to stop progressing so that I can rot at one corner and shake my leg. I know the future-Me will hate the now-Me for not going after what I want with vigor, but I would still park myself at one corner and enjoy my inefficient Me-time.

No good at all.

So, this liner hit home. Nobody has set rules on how fast you have to achieve something; nobody has set regulations on the way and method you must obtain your goals. Moving slowly beats not moving at all. So as long as I keep my eyes on the goal, it does not matter how slowly I progress, as long as I never say die. This sentence has somewhat taken off the pressure and burdensome feeling I habour towards the “process” to achieving my goals. It has made moving towards the bling bling future a more enjoyable one.

“Trust in your heart, mind and soul because you are nothing if you cannot believe in yourself.”

This second part of my affirmation is of my own words and of course, it will be harsh, haha. I have to! For a lazy butt like me, honeyed words ain’t gonna help.

Numerous past experiences had taught me one lesson: always trust in yourself. Your guts, instinct, feelings, however and whatever you name it. Those I believe are my soul trying to communicate with me. And those times when I refused to heed its words, I suffer the consequence. Have you ever done something, for example, putting a glass of water on the table and suddenly a thought bubble came into your mind that maybe you should put the glass on another “safer” spot? And when you waved that thought away, you accidentally toppled the glass of water. That is your soul trying to communicate with you. I believe that every soul has a form of unexplained connection to this universe. Our conscious minds are simply not strong enough to catch the frequencies from the universe.

So, I have learnt to trust myself a little more. I will suggest you to, too.

  1. Say today’s affirmation:

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop. Trust in your heart, mind and soul because you are nothing if you cannot believe in yourself.”

You can see more of the actual Day-15 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-15/

Dream big and believe in yourself, because the power lies within you!

Chloe ❤

Posted in Uncategorized

Day 14 [Self-Image]: “I’m perfect as myself.”

Hello Everyone! I know I know, this is loooong overdue. It has been months since I started this challenge and I have yet to complete it. Only the last two “days” left! Sorry! I have no excuse for my procrastination 😦

I am not ditching this! 2014 is ending, so I am gonna finish this like now.

Day 14 [Self-Image]: “I’m perfect as myself.”

  1. Identify at least one negative self-belief/thought. What is one negative self-belief/thought you have?

I am lazy.

  1. When did this negative self-belief/thought start?

This is a “quality” which I agree of myself. I tend to procrastinate a whole lot. This is not very healthy and beneficial. There are times when I was very hyped up over something and will tend to charge my way forward, only until the middle of the journey where I would begin to procrastinate. This 15-day Affirmation Challenge is a very good example. There were a few occasions when I could post frequently, as much as two posts in a day. But gradually, I began to slow down, and the “lazy” side got the better of me. Numerous times I know that all I have to do is to on my laptop, pull out my Microsoft Word and I would be typing non-stop like now, haha. But, I simply did not.

  1. Challenge this negative self-belief/thought.

Well, I would like to think that it is not entirely true. Perhaps in a different context that I would not be lazy. For example, I may be lazy in my personal life, but I am pretty hardworking when it comes to work. LOL. I would not rest until my work is completed.

  1. Create new positive belief(s).

I know it is a matter of whether I am willing or I am not. I will myself to be lazy and procrastinate. I believe that I am given options to choose otherwise.

  1. Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:

“I’m perfect as myself.”

My Afterthoughts:

So much time has been wasted due to my “laziness” and procrastination. I could have achieved and done so much more if I am otherwise. Another year will be gone soon, and it is high time that I push myself further so as to achieve my desired life/ lifestyle!

You can see more of the actual Day-14 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-14-self-image/

Time does not wait~

Chloe ❤

Posted in Challenge, Health, Motivational

Day 13 [Health]: “I’m growing healthier and stronger every day.”

Hello, everyone!

I know, this is insane! It has been more than a month, where have I been?!

I have been working overtime (OT), everyday (no kidding), for the past month. This is a lesson I have learned by the hard way, and no way am I gonna repeat the mistake: the mistake of not planning my time.

Day flies when I am deeply buried in my job. I started the day tired and ended the day deadbeat. It has became a routine that by the time I reached home after a day’s work, I have time only for dinner (I skip dinner occasionally because it was too late already) and shower then, goodnight. And when weekend comes I just rot at home, trying to recoup from a hectic week, or I will hang out with people, trying to regain my “personal life”. Yet, I still felt drained.

THIS IS NOT THE LIFE THAT I WANT. I am so busy with things that are not of my passion or interest, and I feel so taxed by things that I am not passionate about.

There has been this nagging feeling in my heart for days when I was away from my blog, from all of you. But I did nothing. Sure, I was very tired, but that should not be an excuse! And then days became weeks; I am neglecting one of what really matters most to my heart.

I feel that there’s this void inside of me. I have procrastinated, lazed, found excuses to “rest”, and now I truly regretted.

This is not the life that I want. GET A GRIP CHLOE!

My sincere apology folks, please forgive me for being so dumb. Please continue to stay with me! *bash myself*

OK! This challenge is waaayyy overdue.

Let’s go!

Day 13: [Health]

Health is a topic which I have been very concerned about for this year. As year by year pass, I come to realize the one important asset which the majority of us possess but never put much thought and effort to ensure its wellness – Health.

Without Good Health, what can a person do?

  1. Identify at least one negative health habit you currently have.

That gotta be lack of self-discipline. And this covers a whole lot of areas. I should sleep earlier but I don’t. I should eat healthier but I don’t. I should stop using my phone or ipad or my laptop an hour before I sleep so as to ensure a better sleep in the night, but I don’t. I know that sleep is a major factor in life for good health, but I failed to make my sleep a better one.

  1. Identify reasons supporting each negative habit.

I have not really made up my mind. I promised myself to sleep earlier, but I will end up sleeping even later than the previous night. I failed to decide to really follow my plans. And I tend to think in a way of “this is my ME-time” as an excuse to ignore my earlier decision made. Very, very bad, unwanted habit.

  1. Identify steps to correct each negative habit.

Come up with a time-table. A physical organizer I am gonna keep, with my day planned according to the time-line of the week. I AM GOING TO FRIGGIN’ DO THIS. Sick and tired of being the lazy self. I am not helping myself at all if I continue with my current plan which is no plans at all.

  1. Say today’s affirmation:

“I’m growing healthier and stronger every day.”

My Afterthoughts:

Without health, we are nothing. Honestly. This year is a scary year for me… when it comes to health. I always thought that I am a “healthy person”, just because I have no major illness. But that doesn’t make me a healthy person! Ailment might be accumulating in my body on a daily basis from all my unhealthy habits, until one day my body cannot defend itself anymore, and BAM!

I wouldn’t wanna experience such a day, would you?

It may be tough to alter our lifestyle from the roots like, on the very next second, but we can at least make small changes in baby steps. Let’s do it!

You can see more of the actual Day-13 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-13-health/

Good luck!

Chloe

Posted in Challenge, Wealth & Money

Day 12 [Wealth]: “I’m financially abundant, and money comes to me naturally.”

Hello there! Today is Sunday, how was your weekend so far? Remember not to pack your schedule with too many activities…rest more and drink more water! “Me” time is equally important 🙂

 

Day-12, come on!

 

Day 12: [Wealth]

 

  1. Identify at least one self-limiting money beliefs that you have.

I can’t seem to save/ keep a lot of money. There is always “emergency uses” for my savings.

 

  1. Challenge these belief(s).

I need to be better in my financial planning and be more self-disciplined when it comes to money. I can spend my money like flowing water!

 

  1. Create new positive belief(s).

Turn money into my slave instead of being a slave to my money! I need to better manage my finances so I will not be at the mercy of money.

 

  1. Identify one positive step you can take towards your financial goal.

With all my long-term financial commitment right now, save 20% of my monthly paycheck! Also, to learn more about how to start a passive income stream!

 

  1. Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:

“I’m financially abundant, and money comes to me naturally.”

 

My Afterthoughts:

I believe that money is very real issue to majority of us. Instead of constant grumbles of why-am-I-not-born-with-a-silver-spoon-or-a-gold-mountain-behind-me or why-am-I-always-so-broke, spend real time to walk through the monetary issues that you have now and come up with solutions and action plans to resolve that! That is what I have done and is working towards now 😀

You can see more of the actual Day-12 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-12-wealth/

Dream big and believe in yourself, because the power lies within you~

Chloe

Posted in Career and Jobs, Challenge, Motivational, positive, self-doubt, self-love, self-worth

Day 11 [Career]: “I’m doing what I love, and earning lots of money doing it.”

Monday~ Monday~ today is a Monday~

Right now, my Monday is ending…finally! LOL! Monday is generally a Monday-blue day for the majority. That is because we miss our weekends and are unwilling to welcome another working week! But once I kick-start my week with Monday, my engine will start to run, and another weekend will be arriving soon 😀 HAHA.

OK, that’s a lot of crap as the beginning (that is what Monday will do to me). It is now Day-11! HAHA I know that I am super behind the schedule but. I am glad I do this challenge in a pace I am comfortable with 😀 Not as an excuse, but I feel that more time in between each day’s challenge actually makes me digest each positive affirmation better 🙂

 

Day 11: [Career]

 

  1. Identify your ideal career.

I love reading and writing. I love acting. I love listening to problems and solving them. My ideal career(s) will thus be a novelist/ blogger, actress, and a coach/ therapist.

 

  1. Identify three things blocking you from pursuing your ideal career now.

Novelist/ Blogger

  1. Stable source of income
  2. The time to write

Actress

  1. Opportunities
  2. Stable source of income

Coach/ Therapist

  1. Knowledge on the area of expertise

 

  1. Identify solutions for these obstacles.

Novelist/ Blogger

  1. Build up a passive income system
  2. Come up with a time-table/ fixed schedule/ roster to write regularly

Actress

  1. Research for audition/ competition openings
  2. Build up a passive income system

Coach/ Therapist

  1. Taking up courses on the area of interested expertise.

 

  1. Take action!

OH YEAH!

 

  1. Say today’s affirmation:

“I’m doing what I love, and earning lots of money doing it.”

 

My Afterthoughts:

I am loving this challenge on Career. Career has been something which is constantly on my mind ever since I was 13 years old, no kidding.

My mind and heart are two conflicting domains. The mind wants to find a career which can earn me lots of money (a paradigm influenced by childhood’s poverty) but my heart wants the career to of passion and be self-fulfilling and rewarding. They result in me constantly finding the career path which I will love doing for the rest of my life and which I earn me the income to achieving financial freedom.

Through this challenge, in the midst of penning down my thoughts on my interest, what I see as obstacles, and the solutions, I see a clearer path to attaining my dream job and life 😀 It also gives me the consolations that I am indeed working, albeit baby steps, towards my bling bling future!

I highly recommend anyone who is feeling lost in life in the area of career, to do this!

Good luck 🙂

 

You can see more of the actual Day-11 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-11-career/

Dream big and believe in yourself, because the power lies within you~

Chloe ❤

Posted in Challenge, Love and Relationships, positive

Day 10 [Love]: “I’m attracting my soulmate.” / “I’m in a loving relationship filled with unconditional love, trust, and respect.”

Hello Everyone! Today is a relaxing Sunday, woot!

I am having one, nope, two of the battles in life now, are you having one too? Don’t give up! Battles are always tough, but I am sure we will emerge as an even stronger person when we end the battles in victories! 😀

Without further ado, Day-10, let’s go!

 

Day 10: [Love]

 

  1. Imagine your ideal romantic relationship.

“For singles: What’s your dream relationship like? How would you describe it?

For those in a relationship: Identify your ideal relationship with your partner. It doesn’t matter whether these qualities are currently present in your relationship — simply write them down.”

 

For me, my ideal relationship with my partner is of love, respect, trust, understanding, chemistry, lifelong learning of life itself and appreciation.

All are self-explanatory perhaps except “lifelong learning of life itself”. Be it educational context or improving personal wellbeing as a whole, I am extremely interested and can see myself indulging in lifelong learning perhaps till the day I depart. Thus, my soulmate and partner in life has to be someone who shares the same vision as I do – to constantly improve oneself, because learning never ends.

 

  1. Identify simple steps you can make to this relationship happen.

 

It will be just two simple, yet it-will-be-a-journey-to-achieve steps:

i.  High Quality, Regular Communication: I need to constantly communicate with my partner on how and what I am feeling… this is of vast importance. One shouldn’t expect anyone to be able to read your minds… if you have that in your life right now, that is a blessing, but if you haven’t, don’t feel dejected! Dramas/ movies and fictions made this a “mandatory” criterion and beautify love relationship for the sake of viewership.

ii. Be the person I want my partner to be: Simple, yet the toughest to achieve out of the two steps. If I want my partner to be understanding, I have to be understanding towards him first. If I want my partner to trust me, I have to give him my trust first.

One cannot expect the other party to be “perfect” when one couldn’t even achieve half of the qualities one has listed out, yes?

 

  1. Take action!

Alrighty! On my mark!

 

  1. Say today’s affirmation.

 

“Close your eyes. Visualize yourself in the exact relationship you just painted in Step #1. Both of you are holding each other’s hands and strolling down the beach together, talking, smiling, and laughing. After some time, you stop to hug him/her, and he/she gladly returns your hug. At this moment, both of you are locked in a tight, passionate embrace. Feel the love, excitement, and happiness arising in your heart as all this is happening.”

 

(For singles):

“From this moment on, I’m attracting my soulmate, and in time to come we’ll meet and be forever bound in love and light.”

(For those in a relationship):

“I’m in a loving relationship filled with unconditional love, trust, and respect.”

 

My Afterthoughts:

 

It is easy as abc to list down the criteria and qualities you want your partner to have. It is also as easy as 123 to pinpoint the qualities in which your current partner is lacking of.

However, it may not be as easy when you gotta think and come up of the action steps to working towards your ideal relationship.

Empty talks bring no ideal future. It is time for all of us to be more conscious and aware in our everyday life and interaction not only with our partners, but also with the people around us. Once we are self-aware, we are able to recognise good/ bad points of ourselves and the other party, and come up with action plans to rectify. 😀

Good luck 🙂

You can see more of the actual Day-10 affirmation post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-10-love/

Dream big and believe in yourself, because the power lies within you~

Chloe ❤