Here comes Day-4!
Day 4: [Setbacks]
Oh, my, holy… cow!
Setbacks! Setbacks! Do we have to do this?
BRING IT ON. *thrust chest forward*
1. Identify an obstacle you’re facing currently.
OK. This is going to be a long and stinky story. HAHA. Ready? Where’s your popcorns?
So, by now, you should know that I am working (albeit slowly) towards being a coach in the future. My lifetime dream job is to make the people around me feeling happier and happier on their own. I hope for them to be aware of their capabilities to be happy even in every day’s life. ESPECIALLY in their every day’s lives.
Regardless of you being happy or sad, life still goes on, so why not choose to take on life in a happier mood?
OK, I am digressing. So, I aim to becoming a coach who will specialise in Positive Psychology in near (hopefully) future.
But there are obstaclessss appearing already!
It’s the Money. No kidding, yep, we are talking about the big M here (not McDonald’s!).
I do not know how is it like to be a full-time coach nor do I know much a person can earn from being a full-time coach (cum all the many other things I want to do too :D), but being a fairly low-risked human, I hope to have a reasonable sum of mony (for survival) for my transition period. I’m not talking about a hundred thousand dollars here. It would be a fairly reasonable and attainable sum *cough*
But well, just when I am looking at saving this sum of money and feeling so excited and jittery about my bling bling future at the same time… BAM. Incidents happened.
- I have given myself a certain timeline to earn that enough money at my current job. And I am faced with stress at work => affecting health => worried = > double stress. My team used to consist of nine people. Since February this year until now, 4 have left (of whom 2 are my closest colleagues), 1 is leaving, 1 might be leaving soon. <insert mind-screams> WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE! <end of mind-screams> So you see; my initial plan was to stay for at least another year at this job. But now, with the shortage of manpower cum my best and closest colleagues left cum increased workload cum peak period of the year… .
- My parents are… in the middle of a… huge disagreement which will result in a separation. Coming soon, yo! So, all the more I need the BIG M. And that means I cannot afford to be a full-time self-employed person. As of now. That steady source of income… I hate to admit it, but it is crucial to me and my family at this point of time.
- I am honestly not the best person to manage finances at the moment. That is because I have my course fees to pay and some other installments such as insurances and etc. Ah… I need more monies!
OK, so I am supposed to identify a single obstacle, and I did 3 of them, haha. THIS IS GOING TO BE A LONG POST, TSK.
2. Identify action(s) to overcome this obstacle.
Reframing. Yep, this is something which I have been using, and am still using right now. At least, it makes me feel positive towards this job. I am so VERY proud of myself for staying onto this job… and still planning to hang on longer! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU, CHLOE SIM! You go, girl! 😀 (giving encouragements to yourself is very important too!)
People say that cognitive reframing doesn’t last long . Personally, I think it can last pretty long, depending on how you reframe your mind and adjust your mindset. And how frequently you do that. HAHA does it sound like brainwashing yourself?
And this leads to the next step! 😀
3. Create new positive belief(s) to help you overcome this obstacle.
No kidding. I am a living (HAHA, though still on-going) example of this.
It can be extremely low morale to work in an environment where there is tons of work to be done, you got to meet deadlines every single day, lack of communication with the bosses and yet people are leaving. And you know that you are going to take on even MORE workload because there are lesser people around now! And and and, to top it off, the people who are leaving are the people who you have fun with the most, who you love the most and who you think are the most dependable colleagues.
It really isn’t easy.
Not to mention, to commute to work is a long and tiring journey. Every morning feels like a battle commuting to work. I squeeze in the bus, pull myself out from the can of packed sardines, only to flung myself into another bigger can of sardines aka squeeze in the train. I basically brisk-walked in superb mode all the way to work from the moment I step out of my house. I was drained by the time I reached the office. And then the next long battle begins for the next 9 hours. There was to a point where I hated the morning battle so much that I have the strongest urge to leave my job just so I can end this *wave arm around*.
But I hadn’t.
Why are some people always job-hopping? That is because they do not know what they want from the job. In almost every single job, you would definitely feel tired and sick of it. You would definitely feel like you are under (boredom) / over (stressed) challenged and wish for a change in environment. But every job is the same; if you do not know your purpose of being in this job.
At least, this works for me. I recognise my negative thoughts streaming like volcano lavas every single day. And then one day, I simply put a stop to them. I bring down the entire North Pole on them. OK, not funny. I brainstormed with myself, the pros and cons of staying, and I realised that the pros are material benefits whereas the cons are just being too emotional.
Isn’t being happy the most important thing? You might ask. Yes, it is, of course! But there are short-term happiness and long-term happiness. One got to weigh, at crucial times.
What do I need the most now? The material benefits. Come along in a package would be my long-term happiness. I have looked around and realised that this job offers me the best monetary deal for what paper qualifications I have currently. If I were to leave this place, I would:
a. Spend a longer time to save up the sum of money which I have planed;
b. New environment: got to build up the rapport with people from scratch.
I don’t plan to stay in the rat race for long, so why do I want to switch to a job which would require me to spending unnecessary amount of time and energy on areas where I could avoid?
I see myself as building up more and more RESILIENCE within myself. I have tuned my mindset in such a way that, I am so very, very curious as to how far I can go (aka stay longer) at this job. Hey, Curiosity can be a very important positive emotion!
At this job where people are expecting me to leave at any time soon because, well, just because, but I am hanging on! And managed to enjoy myself while I am hanging by the edge of the cliff, haha!
I believe that having a purpose or an agenda in every thing that you do or circumstance is extremely important. That is because I believe that at times of setbacks or darkness, the purpose, the WHY (why are you in this job in the first place? Why do you choose this XXX in the first place?) will be the beacon of light. The WHY will act as a buffer; it will be the reason you are able to hang on just a little bit more so as to achieve your desired outcome. Yes, you are doing all these for no one else, but for yourself! Never forget that! 😀
Of course, if the cons heavily outweigh the pros… pushing yourself to hang on further might not be a good thing.
I can go on writing more and more but… another day perhaps~ 😀
To conclude this step, I believe that having positive beliefs are extremely important. They lead the way you shape subsequent thoughts. And we all know that thoughts => actions => results. We do not want one negative thought to ruin a supposedly good result or results, don’t we?
4. Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:
“I’ve the power to overcome any obstacle that stands in my way.”
I knew it! I knew this would be long!
But I’m loving it! Do you? 😀
You can see the actual affirmation challenge post by Celestine Chua here: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/affirmation-day-4-setbacks/
Dream big and believe in yourself, because the power lies within you~